The Luckiest Mom on Earth

That's what I'm feeling like after my son sent me flowers for Mother's Day. Aren't they lovely?





Here I am hugging him when I visited him in Coral Gables, a few months ago. (I think he looks a little like he's saying, "Gee, Mom. That's enough.") He's become quite the expert on restaurants, so we went to a Mexican place he recommended. The tortilla soup was superb.



And here I am the day before Mother's Day at a special Mother's Day Tea at Scrapbooks Plus! in Chantilly, VA. Debbie Chabot made this beautiful display of my books for the event.




Here's the display:




And here's Marc Chabot busily cutting up the wonderful French pastries they served for attendees. I can't tell you how good the lemon meringue pie was! I teased Marc that if any murders were committed with a cake knife, I had proof he was involved.



Here's one of the lovely teacup sets Debbie Chabot gave each of us. I plan to "take my tea" in my set from now on. These are so pretty, I know they'll brighten up any day!



One of the women asked me, "How do you get your scrapbooking mojo back when you haven't scrapped in a while?"

I suggest opening a scrapbook magazine and copying a layout. When you're feeling stressed or uncertain, copying a layout is a bit like having someone take you by the hand. It leads you gently back to the fun.

Another great idea is taking a class. There's an altered book class being held at Debbie's store on May 15, and I'm signing up. I need a treat--and I need a chance to learn more about altering books. The project she had on display was so fabulous, I'm itching to get started. It's called "Turtle Dreams" and the money goes to helping endangered sea turtles. That's my kind of fun--good works and good times all in one!

Why I Go To Conferences and Other Events

While I was at Malice, a friend who is a New York Times bestselling author told me that her agent said, "At this point in your career, you no longer need to do personal appearances."

Wow.

I don't know what to think about that. I mean, I understand. At a certain point, your name is well-known and the bookstores are delighted to stock your books. So, I guess you don't have to do so much to promote yourself.

But...I get a lot out of conferences. Oh, sure, I'm still tired and I'm terribly behind. But, I had learned about a new sort of book on tape at the Howard County Library, I met some authors who I hope will become friends, I re-kindled my friendship with other authors, a group of us discussed promotional methods that work, I had the chance to brainstorm a plot with Casey Daniels as we drove to Festival of Mystery, I chatted with another NYT bestseller about when to switch agents and why you should ignore some advice from your author friends, I visited a college bookstore that will now carry my books, I moved a lot of books (the bookstores at Malice sold out of my books and Mystery Lovers sold a lot of copies as well), and I spent time with my fans. Whew.

So faced with the pile up on my desk, I wondered: Did I spend my time wisely?

Then I sent an email to Charlaine Harris asking for a favor. She emailed me that she'd get back to me after she returned home from her tour.

Her tour?

Gee. If Charlaine Harris thinks it's still important to "circulate," shouldn't I be out there pressing the flesh, too? I mean, you can't get any more popular than Charlaine!


Here I am with my Midnight Ink brothers and sisters at Malice before the big dinner.



That's me begging forgiveness from Meredith Cole. I left her out of the list of people who were at the Mysterious Women panel at Howard County Library. And she was sitting right next to me. How ditzy is that? Meredith wrote Posed for Murder, which is about a photographer in New York who becomes embroiled in real life murders when her fantasy pictures are recreated by a killer.



Deb Sharp is one of my favorite people. She writes the "Mama" series. The upcoming one is Mama Gets Hitched. Deb explains, "Mama likes getting married so much that she's doing it again for the fifth time!" As a former journalist, she's committed to doing her research. For one book, she rode a horse across central Florida.



Jan, one of my Pittsburgh fans, made the Stovetop Cookies from my website. Need I confess I gobbled them down on the ride back to D.C.?



I love photos of doors. This one of a church in Pittsburgh was particularly appealing.

Check Out the 5 Star Reviews Photo, Snap, Shot is Getting at Amazon!

Here's what two reviewers have to say about Photo, Snap, Shot--


Love,love, love this third book in the series of Murder Mysteries about Hard working single mom Kiki Lowenstein. Even if you don't find yourself to be a crafter you will really enjoy this book.

**

This book may be classified as a cozy mystery, but it really is a cut above the standard of that genre. Slan has her characters tackle some very complex problems in this new addition to the series.

While all the 3 books are great reads, it is with Photo, Snap, Shot that we really see growth, both in terms of subject matter and writing. The characters are becoming more rounded and the "community" of the book is getting fleshed out. Both characters from the previous books as well as new character introduced here are realistic and worth investing in.

I suspect that the series will only continue to grow as further books come out, so why not jump on board now, while there are only 3 books to catch up on. These are quick reads and while scrapbookers will find useful tips in each book, non-crafters will all appreciate the story of a single Mom struggling to raise her daughter.

Twenty Types of Misdirection

There are a variety of ways to obscure facts, to cover over clues, and to intrigue our readers. Here are some of our favorites!

1. Red herring—The name is taken from the practice of dragging a dead fish over a trail to confuse hunting dogs. Here, a false clue is planted, usually by the author.

2. False clue—Different from a red herring, because this clue is planted by a character.

3. Overlooked clue—A classic method relying on our inability to triage information. Often the overlooked clue is “sandwiched” between other pieces of information.

4. Misinterpreted clue—When analyzing the clue, the sleuth comes to an erroneous conclusion. For example, a suspect has cat hair on him, but it came from his own pet not the victim’s.

5. Clues of omission—Something should have been present, something should have happened, or something should have been mentioned, but wasn’t. For example, a dog should have barked at an intruder. If the pooch didn’t, why not?

6. Classic misdirection—The sleuth was paying attention to the wrong situation so that a clue or the importance of the clue was overlooked.

7. Discounted clues—A clue is not given appropriate weight because it’s very commonplace or it’s too obscure to seem meaningful. (Example, a robbery didn’t occur on a cloudy day because a sundial was not functioning. Who would guess a cloudy day would matter?)

8. Dismissed clue—A clue is considered, and then decided to be irrelevant, but actually has import.

9. Cipher clue—A clue that can only be interpreted once a code is cracked or when additional pieces of the clue become available.

10. Point of view (POV) misdirection—Because of one character’s POV, the clue seems meaningless. This can happen because the POV character’s world view is askew, as when prejudiced. Or because the narrator is unreliable.

11. Botched clue—Information is mishandled or misinterpreted. For example, a fingerprint is smudged by the investigator. This could also be the result of an inadequate chain of custody.

12. “Pre-emptive strike” clue—The sleuth is provided information to purposely color interpretation of a clue or a person’s reputation. For example, the sleuth is told the informant is a drug addict when he/she is not, and therefore, the sleuth doesn’t trust the informant’s reliability.

13. Inaccurate witness—This is a case where the witness truly and honestly is mistaken, as when a person’s eyesight or hearing is faulty.

14. “Can’t chase two rabbits a1`nd catch one”—The sleuth, when presented with many leads, follows up on the wrong one, thus losing the opportunity to find/use/safeguard inform.

15. “I’m protecting someone” clue—A clue is falsely provided or a confession is made to protect a secret or another person.

16. Character flaw—A flaw in the sleuth’s character or world view—rather than in a witness’s character or world view —leads him/her to an erroneous conclusion or to overlook key information. For example, if the sleuth can’t believe a woman would kill viciously, he might overlook clues that prove the murderer is female.

17. Specialized knowledge clue—This is a clue that only has meaning to a person with specialized knowledge. For example, only someone who knows about opera might know that Puccini’s Sister Angelica concerns the death of a child.

18. “Warned off” clue—The sleuth is warned to stop an investigation or to overlook certain information. This in itself becomes a clue.

19. “Lost” clue—The clue is temporarily misplaced (such as put in a coat pocket) or forgotten.

20. Personal crisis—Not really a clue, but still a misdirection. This is when a problem in the sleuth’s personal life keeps him/her from properly following up on information or a suspect.

**

Copyright 2007: Judy Moresi (aka J. Hassler Moresi) , Donna Ross (aka Fedora Amis), and Joanna Campbell Slan. For reprint information, please contact Joanna at joannaslan@aol.com


** NOTE: This handout was shared at Malice Domestic 2010

With Deep Appreciation

Once in a while, someone does something so kind and so unexpected that I just want to dissolve in a puddle of tears. That happened to me last Thursday at the Howard County Library.

I was invited to by Jacquelynn Morris to be a part of their "Mysterious Women" Panel discussion. My friend Elaine Viets had suggested me. Being on a panel with Elaine was a career highpoint. She's been a wonderfully supportive friend and mentor. Back when I lived in St. Louis, I idolized her. It wasn't until she moved to Florida that we met. I reached out to her in an email, asking for advice about becoming a mystery author. In that way, I consider her one of my "fairy godmothers."

So you can see why being on a panel with her was a thrill. That's a photo above of us taking a tour. It's a fabulous library, a real resource for the community. The place was buzzing, and I itched to sit down and pore over some of the resources.

The other authors were Kris Neri, Beth Groundwater, L. C. Hayden, and Debbi Mack.

Right before the panel started, I spotted Kristopher, a young man I met some years back at Malice. That's a photo of us together below. He came over, we exchanged hugs, and then...he gave me a gift.








"You're always giving us stuff, so I thought I'd do the same for you," he said.

And my eyes filled with tears.

I don't expect anything from any of my fans. The fact that you all honor me by reading my work is more than enough. So I was completely caught off-guard.

Have I told you lately how much I appreciate all of you?

If not...consider yourself told!

Here's a look at the project he did:

Scrapper's Block...and the Page for Malice

I read in one of the scrapbooking magazines that the one color that scrapbookers found to be the one they shun is...PURPLE.

This intrigued me. I love purple. In fact, I love all colors. Why would this one be so readily avoided? I wondered. Then I saw my new book cover--purple and pink. Hmmm. Kevin Brown, the genius who does my covers, seemed to be able to work with purple.

Fast forward several months. I agreed to again contribute a custom-made scrapbook page for the auction that Malice holds every year to benefit charities. Last year my page brought in $140, making it one of the pricier items.

Purple. The page had to be purple to match my book cover.

I went to buy purple paper and discovered there weren't many choices. Lots of pink. Not a lot of purple. I let the paper sit for a while. I started on the rubber stamped portions. But gee...the page itself seemed hard.

I don't know whether it was my mood, the fact I felt I needed to "top" last year, or what, but I had a full-blown case of scrapper's block. So I did what I always do in such circumstances, I found a magazine with a layout I liked and I scraplifted.

The page took me most of the day, between coloring and adding glitter to the teacup, punching and assembling flowers, and so on.

How do you like it? The book opens and has a small album inside so the buyer can add lots of photos. I figure there's room for a big photo in the upper left quadrant, too. Oh, and thanks to my friends at Spotted Canary and EK Success for the flower embellishments.

Large Print News and Is He Dead Yet?

Yesterday I learned that large print rights to Cut, Crop & Die were purchased by Library Publishing/BBC (UK). So, Kiki and Company will be available in the UK in large print. The ISBN is 978-1-408-4572-8. It's hardcover. There's also a softcover edition, ISBN 978-1-408-45753-5.

I bet the crowds are lining up at Waterstones right now!

Tonight's an MWA (Mystery Writers of America) meeting with a private investigator as our speaker. Stay tuned for more!

All That Other Stuff

Pam DeVoe did a nice interview with me for the St. Louis Sisters in Crime blog. Check it out here.

One of the questions she asked, one I get asked a lot, is, "What's a typical day like for you?"

Today was anything but typical. I worked all day on promotions. I love that, but it's really time-consuming. I worked contacting the media in St. Louis because I'll be there in May. I enjoyed hearing back from my friend Jane Henderson, the book editor for the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, right away. I hope she can get Photo, Snap, Shot reviewed because I think her readers will love it. But I also know book pages are getting fewer and fewer inches to work with.

I worked setting up another signing while I'm there. I'd been trying to connect with Timmy and Nancy from For Keeps Sake, and finally did. I'll go to a crop at their store after doing my signing at Pudd'nhead Books, Friday, May 21. See, scrapbookers stay up all hours of the night, so I knew this would work! It will be nice to see my sister scrappers at For Keeps Sake. I always enjoy Nikki at Pudd'nhead Books. Few people are as knowledgable about this business as she is.

I ordered some cool aprons for the Killer Hobbies Blog Sisters to wear at various events. I looked into some postcards so we could advertise our progressive story, which is really long enough to be a novella. We'll start posting the story on May 2, so if you aren't a follower at Killer Hobbies, you'll want to be!

I followed up calling a local craft store about a signing. I emailed another bookstore about a signing. I set up spreadsheets so I could track blogs that I'll be giving review copies of Photo, Snap, Shot. I emailed handouts to Peter Green with the St. Louis Writers Guild. I responded to fan mail and sent out new bookmarks. (Want some? Mail a self-addressed stamped envelope to me at Joanna Slan, c/o Steinway Piano Gallery, Tysons Corner Center, 1961 Chain Bridge Road, McLean VA 22102.)

Also, I worked with a graphic designer to get an ad ready for Crimespree Magazine. Fortunately, I was organized enough that I had my release form for my new photos at hand. This is one of them. I hope you like it!

I beat myself up a little because I can't find the name of the adorable young lady who runs some of the forums on Splitcoaststampers. See, I use Outlook, but sometimes things slip past me! Sheesh.

Then, from six to nine, I wrote. I'm working on a short story for a competition. I don't know if I'll get that done, but...

My husband will be home in a bit. He had a long day, too. We'll sit in front of the television. While we watch, I'll tie ribbons on bookmarks.

Tomorrow, I start all over again!

Love Crafts and Mysteries? Malice is for YOU!

If you love mysteries and crafts, you won’t want to miss Malice Domestic, Saturday, May 1, 2010 at the Crystal Gateway Marriott in Arlington, VA. Mystery authors from all over the world will gather to meet their fans and talk about their books. Plus, there’s a live auction with cool stuff. Here’s a sampling--

* A collection of Peel & Stick stamps, a certificate for a free personalized stamp, and 7 colorful ink cartridges---a $400 retail value!

* A customized, one-of-a-kind scrapbook page by Joanna Campbell Slan, author of the Kiki Lowenstein Mystery Series. (Priceless. One like it sold last year for $140.)

* A basket from the Killer Hobbies blog sisters. There are 16 great books in this basket, and all sorts of crafting supplies. You’ll have tons of fun keeping busy with the KH Blog Sisters’ loot! Valued at $200.

(I'll post a photo of the customized page and the KH Blog Sisters' loot soon!)

A day pass is only $125. The Saturday pass includes the chance to bid in the live auction and the Agatha Banquet (only a few seats are left). The Sunday pass includes the Agatha Tea. Go to registrar@malicedomestic.org to sign up.

Authors attending will include Dorothy Cannell, Katherine Hall Page, JoAnna Carl, Elaine Viets, Rhys Bowen, and Mary Higgins Clark. For a full list of the authors go to http://www.malicedomestic.org/registeredauthors.html

Time for a Change...or Two

Nothing stays the same, does it? I keep casting my thoughts back to one calendar year ago. The amount of change in my life is positively dizzying. (Is that a word?)

I'm not just talking about a change in locale.

CHANGE IN WORD COUNTS

This morning I heard from my editor that Book #4 is a bit long. I'm not surprised. I had noticed that my original goal was 80-85,000 words. The more recent contract we're negotiating shows a final word count of 70,000 words. That's a big change. Especially since I've been working very hard to develop subplots that take my books to the next level.

CHANGE IN MARKETING STRATEGIES

Today, most publishers schedule books to come out yearly. When you think about that, it's a bit odd. I mean, I watch my favorite shows every week, and they've got me hooked. So why is it different with books? I would love to share my Kiki short stories between the book launches. We'll have to see if I can.

CHANGE IN MY HAIRSTYLE

For some odd reason, most of the curl in my hair has just...disappeared. I have no idea now. Maybe it symbolizes that I'm not nearly so tightly wound. Or maybe it's the result of living near Washington, D. C., where everyone seems to be very, um, personally conservative and straight-laced. Curly doesn't seem to fit my new life.

CHANGE IN MY WEBSITE

Stay tuned. Working on this.

CHANGE IN MY PRIORITIES

A old friend sent me a ranting political piece she'd written that was totally inflammatory--and then she asked me to critique it. This came totally out of the blue. I thought to myself, "I didn't sign up for this." See, when you work at home by yourself all day, and you get something that's so...ugly, it's hard to shake the mood. As a wise business coach once said, "The most important thing any entrepreneur can do is protect their confidence." Translated for writers that becomes, "The most important thing any writer can do is protect her mental state." I should have told my old friend, "Please don't send me anything like this again."

CHANGE IN STATUS

Used to be, I was the new kid on the block. My dear pal Emilie Richards came over for breakfast the other day, and we had a lovely talk about how to write a synopsis, how to keep track of a story in progress, and where we hoped to go with our next books. I reflected at the time that this isn't a conversation we could have had years ago. I didn't know enough to ask Emilie the questions I'm asking today. I guess I'm not such a newbie anymore! This lovely blog post by Pam DeVoe confirms it.

Where Ideas Come From--Mole Removal 101

While I'm writing I pop up now and again to do household chores. This morning I was moving clothes from the washer to the dryer. First I had to pick off all the pieces of tissue that had partially dissolved in the wash and where stuck all over the pants and shirts.

Sigh. No matter how carefully I search every pocket, I still miss a tissue or two.

Ideas are like that. They pop up in the most unexpected places. They get all clingy and refuse to go away. After they go through the wash, they don't look much like they did originally, but you can still tell what they were. Sort of.

Over on Cozy First Mysteries, a yahoo group, the members are doing a "buddy read" of Cut, Crop & Die. I've been following the comments of Julesy (their leader), Angie, Shannon, Shala, Mare, Vicki, Katie, Shauna, Mary C, and Melissa (did I miss anyone?) with much interest. (Oh, and the yahoo group owner is Beverly.)

Here's how it works: Julesy and Angie(as co-leaders) would post a short synopsis of chunks of the book as they read it. Then the leaders would solicit opinions from the others. It's almost like someone is doing a transcript of a real-time book group. And I love it. Seeing how readers react about my choices is incredibly enlightening. I'm improving my craft by taking note of their responses. And did I mention it's good for the ego? Oh, yeah. On days when I can't get anything written, seeing these nice ladies' responses makes me want to work doubly hard to create books worthy of them.

Of course, sometimes they don't like what I've written. That's okay, too. It's a great learning experience, and usually they have good suggestions. (In fact, one was so good, I wished I'd had it BEFORE the books were printed, but...)

Recently, they read the portion of Cut, Crop & Die where Kiki goes to the spa. Julesy said she was laughing so hard she could barely type her synopsis. My heart soared with joy. Someday, if I'm a really good kid, maybe I'll get nominated for an award for humorous writing. I'd love that because I totally ascribe to Minnie Pearl's comment that laughter is God's hand on the shoulder of a weary world.

The group also wondered where I got the idea for chasing moles away with vibrators. Here's what I wrote:

My husband was doing a “Sheila” about the moles in our yard. As I am wont to do, I started chatting with the pest specialist we hired. (I like to ask people questions about their work. He was initially very quiet, but once he discovered I was really curious, he opened up. I thanked him in the book. His name was Scott.) Then I went online. To my shock, I discovered some online place selling vibrators to get rid of moles. I wondered, “Do the vibrators just make the moles so crazy-happy they stay in their beds all day? What’s the deal here?” A short time afterwards, we were coming home from the airport in St. Louis and drove past all the adult sex toy shops on Lindbergh Ave. I guess every big town has such places. Usually they’re close to where lonely travelers might be.

I put two and two together. I mean, really, does a mole care what the shape of the vibrator is?

Remind me to post the photo of my freeze dried mole someday. I used to travel around the country giving humorous speeches, and that mole was a real highlight. I can't count the number of times I've had my picture taken with him. And no, as far as I know, he's never had a close encounter with a vibrator.

But then you never know, do you?

Taking Criticism (Kate, Are You There?)

I never, ever wanted to watch Dancing with the Stars (DWTS), but now I'm hooked. My reason for not wanting to be a viewer is simple: I love to dance. Therefore, watching other people having a good time is like...torture. I spend every minute wishing I was dancing along!(Check out the dancing scene in Cut, Crop & Die. I had to tone it down some, but that's me, bay-bee.)

Lately, I've been watching DWTS and thinking about criticism. It's always hard to take, isn't it? But I've noticed that the stars and participants who can't take it are usually the ones who don't make it to the final round. Makes sense.

Now I'm going to get snarky. Can you believe the way Kate Gosselin is acting? I shudder when I see people roll their eyes at the panel of dance experts. I mean, I don't care how snippy Bruno gets or how tough Len is. They do know what they're talking about.

But Bruno and Len and Carrie Ann are just part of the crew. The hardest working folks in the show, in my humble opinion, are the professional dancers. I mean, dancers have the lifespan of a gnat. It's just so incredibly hard on your body. These kids turn up, step up, and dance it up every week. So, spouting off to a dancing pro and telling him he doesn't know how to teach is just wrong. But that's exactly what Kate did. In the UK, they call that "cheeky." To be that rude, takes...well...it takes something. If Kate's goal is to show her kids how to act, gee, I hope the show airs after their bedtime. Especially if reports are true that she's also being a real pill by showing up late on the show. Whoa-doggies. Personally, I'm getting a bit weary of hearing Kate pull the "I'm just a mom trying to survive" card. I see a lot of moms trying to survive, and golly, their lives don't look at all like Kate's.

It's tough to take criticism. I know. I stomp around the house after it comes my way. But notice, that's my house. We don't have cameras rolling here.

Right now I'm working on a new idea. I keep showing it to my husband. He keeps telling me how I can improve it. I HATE his help. Hate it. But he's usually right and I remind myself that if I can put my ego aside and listen, my work and I will both be better for it.

Here's the deal: If you're going to live a public life, you better grow tough skin and a poker face. At the very least, keep your mouth shut when people give you good advice. Oh, and if you want proof that sneering is not a good idea, here's a tip--anytime you can put "sneering" and "your name" together and get google hits, honey, it's time to clean up your act. Even if Bruno did just compare you to a shopping cart!

Besides, didn't anyone ever tell Kate her face could freeze that way?

Notes to Self after Trip to Costa Rica

Note to self: When sitting out in the sun, first remove cartouche so you don't have a weird white rectangle in the midst of your tan.

Note to self: Just because you are allergic to them, doesn't mean you can't enjoy them. It's okay to love cats from afar. Taking pictures of them is cool. Very cool.




Note to self: Don't forget to look UP. You might miss something beautiful if you don't.



Note to self: Sitting and thinking is important. Take time for it.



Note to self: Sunblock, every day. Even if it's raining outside. Or you will look like this.



Note to self: Pouting is very unattractive.

Joanna's Schedule for April, May and June

If you are along the way, or near to one of these events, please let me know. If I can stop in and visit, I will. Also, this isn't complete. I'm still working on it, so feel free to let me know if there's someway we can meet!

**

Wednesday, April 21, 7:00 PM
Spring Ridge Club
9090 Ridgefield Dr., Frederick, MD 21701-6728
Private event

**

Sunday, April 25
Kensington (MD) Day of the Book
Details to come

**

Friday, April 30-May 2
Malice Domestic
Crystal Gateway Marriott Hotel, 1700 Jefferson Davis Highway, Arlington, VA
Panel on Sunday, May 2 at 9 a.m.
Will host a table at the banquet.
Will participate in Malice-Go-Round, partnering with Penny Warner.

**

Monday, May 3
Festival of Mystery
Greek Orthodox Church 12 Washington St., Oakmont PA
Includes tea with local library


**

Tuesday, May 4, 11:30 a.m.
Fan event at Union Grill, Pittsburgh PA
Private event

**

Saturday, May 8, 2-4 p.m.
Mother’s Day Tea and Booksigning Event
Scrapbooks Plus!
14502A Lee Road, Chantilly, VA 20151

**
Start of Kiki Lowenstein’s World Tour—

Monday, May 17, 7 p.m.
Foul Play Mystery
27 E. College Ave., Westerville, OH, 43081

**

Tuesday, May 18, noon
Mooresville (IN) Public Library
220 W. Harrison St, Mooresville, IN 46158

**

Tuesday, May 18, 6 p.m.
Oprah’s Book Club of Monroe City
1242 Main Street, Monroe City, IN 47557

**

Wednesday, May 19, 6:00 PM
Professional Investigators Council of Greater St. Louis
Syberg’s, 2430 Old Dorsett Road, Maryland Heights, MO 63043
Private event

**

Thursday, May 20, 7-8:30 p.m.
St. Louis Writers Guild
Barnes & Noble Booksellers
8871 Ladue Road, St. Louis, MO 63124

**

Friday, May 21, 11-1 p.m.
Mystery Book Club
Barnes & Noble Booksellers
721 Gravois Road
Fenton MO 63026

**

Friday, May 21, 7-8 p.m.
Pudd’nhead Books
37 S. Old Orchard Ave., Webster Groves, MO 63119

**

Saturday, May 22, 1-4 p.m.
Daisy Lane
2619 Lakeland Blvd., Mattoon, IL 61938

**

Saturday, May 22, 7-10 p.m.
Scrapbook Factory
“A Crop to Die For” Dinner Mystery Play and signing
2004 W. Hwy. 50, O'Fallon, IL 62269-1645

**

Sunday, May 23, noon-2 p.m.
Barnes & Noble Booksellers
320 Mid Rivers Center Drive, St Peters, MO 63376


**

Sunday, May 23, 4 p.m.
Left Bank Books
399 N. Euclid Ave
St. Louis MO

**

Wednesday, June 23, TBD
Scrapbooks Plus!
Scrapbook journaling class. Call ahead for details.
14502A Lee Road, Chantilly, VA 20151

**

Friday and Saturday, June 25-26, 8 a.m. to 6 p.m.
Great American Scrapbook Convention
Teaching classes and selling books.
Dulles Expo Center
4368 Chantilly Shopping Center, Chantilly, VA 20151-4016


Saturday, June 26, TBD
Scrapbook Crop and Signing
Scrapbooks Plus!
Scrapbook journaling class. Call ahead for details.
14502A Lee Road, Chantilly, VA 20151

**

Sunday, June 27 TBD
American Library Association
Signing at Midnight Ink table

World Tour News

I'm working like crazy on upcoming special appearances to promote Photo, Snap, Shot.

I wish I could visit each and every one of you. Really I do. I've had so many nice invitations. Please know that they warm my heart. I'm trying to keep good records, although we've moved in the middle of this venture and I've since found out that my computer program did NOT archive messages as it should. I figure that if I keep records of your requests I might be able to visit you sometime in the future, if not now. You see, I have a difficult choice to make when I tour. I can see you in person or I can be about the business of writing. As you can imagine, touring takes money and time, and the latter commodity is very hard to replace. So please know that I keep trying to show up in as many places as possible.

I do have a few alternatives to offer. If I can't visit you in person, we can always talk by phone to your group, or we can try Skype and you can actually see me in my natural setting, or we can use the "chatroom" function on my website.

Meanwhile, to view my most current travel schedule, I invite you to go to BookTour, plug in "Joanna Campbell Slan" and see where I'll be.

"A Crop to Die For"

Looking for a fun and different idea for your crop group? Why not hold a dinner mystery theatre event? I've written a play you can put on with only six actors and very few props. It makes a great "frame" for a crop. The cost is only $30, which makes it perfect for a fundraising event. You can use the script as many times as you want for that one fee.

The script, instructions, a "Whodunnit Form" and a form for ordering books is available at YouPublish Just look through my "library" and you'll see "A Crop to Die For" as one of the offerings.

Kiki Goes "Irish"-- and You Get a Lucky Break!

Kiki has gone "Irish" for today! In honor of St. Patty's Day, she has arranged a special deal with The Stamp Maven for any of Joanna's readers who want to get a head start on crafting supplies for Easter and beyond. Any leprechaun who places a $50 order with Anne before midnight Friday, March 19 will receive free shipping on that order. That's a savings of 10%!

Check out Anne's blog for TONS OF TIPS, specials, and classes on scrapbooking and stamping, http://stampmaven.com. While you're there, you may want to sign up for her monthly newsletter. You'll also find links to all of the catalogs and you can browse to your heart's content without even kissing the Blarney Stone!


(Leave a comment on the blog and Anne will send you a free class tutorial by email!)


When you are ready to place your order, or if you have questions, email anne@stampmaven.com or call (972) 234-9118.

Publisher's Weekly Weighs in on Photo, Snap, Shot

Photo Snap Shot: A Kiki Lowenstein Scrap-N-Craft Mystery Joanna Campbell Slan. Midnight Ink (www.midnightinkbooks.com), $14.95 paper (336p) ISBN 978-0-7387-1976-4

In Agatha-finalist Slan's diverting third scrapbooking mystery (after 2009's Cut, Crop & Die), Kiki Lowenstein's 12-year-old daughter, Anya, a student at St. Louis's fancy Charles and Anne Lindbergh Academy, ventures with another girl into the balcony of the school theater, where they stumble on the dead body of an unpopular teacher, Sissy Gilchrist. Hired on the basis of her family's social standing, Sissy was dating a black man—an act that may have given someone motive for murder. Kiki teams again with her crush, the unfortunately married Det. Chad Detweiler, who investigated her husband's still unsolved murder in the first book in the series, Paper, Scissors, Death (2008). Kiki's job at Time in a Bottle, a scrapbooking store, sometimes distracts from the murder investigation, but the subject of racial prejudice makes this a cut above the usual craft-themed cozy. (May)

The Winner of the 2010 Fla-MAN-go Award Is Barry Eisler

Some of the nicest people I know...kill people...on paper.

Barry Eisler is one of those nice people. He's unfailingly gracious. He doesn't take himself too seriously. He's smart as a whip. He's a heck of a businessman. He's a good sport.

At SleuthFest this past weekend, he again proved why he's one of everyone's favorite authors. On Saturday, Barry was awarded the "Fla-MAN-go," an honor with a dubious past. Seems that one SleuthFest years ago, the women attendees discovered that the men attendees were discussing which of the women were "hot." In retaliation, the ladies decided to have their own award ceremony. But to add to the drama, the contest results would be public. All the male contestants are called to a podium. The winner, when announced, is awarded a trophy and a pink boa.

Yeah, you read that right...a pink feather boa.

On Saturday, Barry won the coveted "Fla-MAN-go" Award. After they draped the fuzzy pink stuff around his neck, Barry graciously strolled through the ballroom of the hotel on his "squawk of shame." When asked about this, his newest honor, Barry said, "This represents the pinnacle of my career as an author."

In a world full of people who take themselves too seriously, Barry Eisler is a great reminder that nice people finish first, always.

Gee, I've never had my photo taken with a Fla-MAN-go before. Pretty cool beans! (I really was smiling, honest! I thought I had a cold all weekend. Turned out, I'm incredibly allergic to tree pollen, and Florida was chock-a-block full of it. ARGH. Nothing like having red eyes and a drippy nose when you are standing next to a handsome guy, huh? Does wonders for your confidence!)

World Premiere of "A Crop to Die For" Dinne Mystery Theatre

What do you get when you combine murder, scrapbooking and mystery theatre?

A Crop to Die For! The new dinner mystery theatre that had its world premiere last Saturday at ScrapbooksPlus! in Chantilly, VA.

The story begins when Kiki Lowenstein brings a carload of women along to a crop. Bit by bit, the women reveal their secrets, and tempers flare. Then we all take a break for dinner.

BANG! Somebody "dies!" (Of course, it was all in good fun. We used acrylic paint on our "victim" for the bullet hole in her forehead.)

The crop participants had a good time figuring out "whodunnit." Those who guessed right were given a discount coupon by Debbie Chabot (the store owner), and one lucky person (Larcey) won a special prize.

Many thanks to our wonderful cast: Lisa H., Michelle V., Beverlee S. and Kate S. (You all did a splendid job.)

You can read what my new friend Marlynn (who's with me in the photo above) said in her beautiful blog "Honeysuckle Breeze." Check out her ATCs. Aren't they gorgeous?

Want to put on a dinner theatre featuring Kiki Lowenstein at your store? As soon as I make a few adjustments to the script, it will be available for you to use at your own gathering. (By the way, I had lots of fun playing Kiki. It sure wasn't much of a stretch.)

Courage--Why Pets Matter So Much to Us in Times of Trouble

As my mother lay dying, I held tight to Courage.

No, I don't mean a sense of bravery or a feeling that I could prevail. I mean Courage the Chihuahua, pictured above. (Or as his owner, my sister Jane, calls him, he's Courage the Chee-whoie-whoie.)

That tiny dog became my anchor in a rough and stormy sea. Mom's coma happened quite suddenly, and I was without the daily resources I usually depend upon to keep myself going emotionally. I was far from home, without my husband, and without my own dogs. I didn't have a car and I couldn't use my typical lifeline, the computer. Like a spaceman in zero gravity, I had a hard time finding my balance.

Our mother's sick room was my world. Courage was my comforter. Small and portable, he would crawl into my lap for petting. As I stroked him, I felt the tension and fear leave me. A sense of zen-like calm came over me. As long as I could lift my hand, run it over his tiny back, and start again, I could go on.

I could handle what was happening, handle the horror of watching my mother's body fail her, handle the anguish that came from realizing I couldn't ease her suffering, and handle the emptiness of the long future ahead without her...as long as I could keep petting Courage.

Now I have confirmation my feelings weren't unique. I just finished reading "Making Rounds with Oscar," an extraordinary book by David Dosa, a geriatrician who works at Steere House Nursing and Rehabilitation Center in Providence, RI. Seems that Oscar (pictured below) would instinctively know when a patient was dying. The little cat made it his duty to be there as a sort of handmaiden to the process.

When Oscar's "talent" was first reported to Dr. Dosa, he dismissed it. Nothing in his scientific background could explain Oscar's intimate knowledge. Indeed, if you've ever lost a family member, you know the answer to the question, "How much time does she have?" yields wildly inaccurate responses. Health professionals are the first to admit how hard it is to predict someone's demise.

Yet, Oscar proved himself to be an incredibly accurate prognosticator of time of death. Dr. Dosa found this hard to believe. After all, most of the patients at Steere were in poor health. The doctor reasoned that Oscar simply noticed an increase in activity and followed the "crowd" to the room of any patient who was dying.

But even so, Oscar's abilities were hard to explain. One evening when two people were dying at once, Oscar sat with one patient until he passed and then raced out of the room to jump onto the bed of a second patient who died shortly thereafter.

Dr. Dosa decided to take a scientific approach and interview families who shared their loved ones' last moments with Oscar. The doctor quickly discovered that Oscar's predictive talents were not nearly so important as the measure of relief his presence afforded grieving families.

One woman said, "I think of Oscar as my angel. He was here for my mother, and here for me, too. With Oscar at my side...well, I felt a little less alone." Another interviewee said, "...Oscar gave me the feeling this is all natural."

Since Oscar and Dr. Dosa had a rocky start--Oscar bit the doctor when they first met-- Dr. Dosa begins the book with a sense of skepticism. He accepts the presence of the cats in the nursing center (there are two on each of the three floors of the facility), but he doesn't really see the animals as intrical. In a way, Dr. Dosa thinks the center is doing the animals a favor by providing homes for these strays. At best, he sees them as decorative, a homey touch much akin to having living plants and hanging pictures on the wall.

All that changes as Dr. Dosa begins to explore the comfort Oscar provides to grieving families. Dr. Dosa writes, "Maybe we started adding cats to make this house feel more like a home. But I was starting to think they were the ones teaching us that what makes a home is a family."

Courage did the same for me. He reminded me that even though my mother was leaving us, I was surrounded by her legacy. We all loved her, and one of her gifts was her love of animals. Another was our love for each other. Nothing, not even death, could steal my mother's love from us.

The Return on Our Investment

I love this photo. My new pal Donna Manz took it for the Vienna (VA) Connection. You can read the entire article here.

That's Vicky, on the left. You can't see her harness, but of course, it is pink. She's a girly-girl of a dog. We "adopted" Victoria in England, so she's a British Bichon and a little smaller than the American breed. Since her father was an English champion, Vicky is a bit of a princess. Sarah, one of the adorable little girls who lives down the street, told me (with a look of total sincerity on her face), "When I die, if I come back, I want to come back as Victoria."

Sarah also said, "I'm not sure if Vicky's very smart or not."

I said, "Oh, she's plenty smart. Let me ask you, does Vicky get you to do exactly what she wants?"

"Hmm. You're right!" said Sarah.

Believe me, Vicky knows her loyal subjects. She only does what she wants, when she wants.

And that's Rafferty on the right with the blue harness. He's a Bichon-Poodle mix. Would you call that a Bi-Poo? (You might if you knew Raffi!) He's only got three legs, but golly, he certainly makes the most of all three. He can jump up on furniture, a trick Vicky only recently mastered. (Actually, I think she was simply accustomed to having us, her humble servants, lift Her Majesty.)

They're my posse. When I'm hard at work writing, they keep me company by sitting in my office. Raffi whines unless I get him his own cushion because Vicky does NOT like to share. At night, Raffi jumps from sofa to chair to my lap. He doesn't know he's too big to be a lap dog!

Yeah, it's a bit of a hassle to plan for letting them out or getting dog sitters, but you know, I'd be so very, very lonely all day without them. When they're at the groomers, I feel a bit lost.

David and I were talking the other day about traveling, and we decided that we want to go places where we can bring the dogs along, too. It's just hard on all of us to leave them in a kennel or with sitters.

I realize that a lot of folks decide that once their children leave the nest, it's best not to be encumbered by a pet. But, our dogs own our hearts. They've made our new house a home. They're my posse, my small, furry personal herd of friends.

So if we have to open a wallets a bit more frequently, if we have to work a little harder at planning our lives, and if we have to glance at our watches and race home to let them out...it's really such a small price to pay for all the love we get in return.

Snow Ice Cream

When life hands you lemons, you make lemonade. So it follows that when life dumps a ton of snow on you, you make ice cream. Yes, ice cream!

Eliza Barclay wrote a fun article for the Washington Post about the history of "snow cream." She even checked with the EPA and learned that while they wouldn't recommend consuming snow in large quantities, a dish of snow probably couldn't hurt you. Furthermore, it seems that when snow falls in copious quantities as we've had of late, the tiny flakes actually scrub the sky clean. (Clean-ish?)

Fortified by this research, and by the total mind-numbing boredom of cabin fever, I decided to give the treat a try.

First, I grabbed a long handled ladle so I could reach deep into a snow drift. Then I filled a bowl with scoops of snow.

Next, I opened a can of condensed milk, a bag of Spenda and my bottle of vanilla. I stirred a can and a half into the snow, added a layer of Spenda and three teaspoons of vanilla. (I suggest you adjust the amounts and taste as you go along.)

Finally, I poured the semi-frozen mix into a plastic container and set it in the freezer for an hour. Voila! Tasty, yummy, ice cream. Oh, and that dark dollop on top is chocolate syrup. (Yes, I know. It looks like ... well...it isn't!)

Read Eliza's enchanting article here:

http://http//elevatedsouthern.wordpress.com/2010/02/11/when-life-hands-you-snow-make-dessert/

Roasted Butternut Squash with Apples

This is sooo good that I had to share it:

Roasted Butternut Squash with Apples

20 oz. container butternut squash (peeled, cubed & seeded)
1 large onion (peeled and diced)
1 T. olive oil
sea salt to taste
3 T. red wine vinegar
3 T. low calorie maple syrup
1 apple (peeled, cored and diced)
1/4 C. chopped walnuts
1/4 C. dried cranberries

Toss oil, onion and butternut together and spread on cookie sheet with silk liner. (Or foil lined.) Sprinkle on sea salt. Roast for 45 minutes in a 350 degree oven.
Remove. Whisk together vinegar and syrup. Pour liquid over the squash and onion mix. Add in apples, nuts and cranberries. Makes 6 servings of less than 155 calories each. About 2 Weight Watchers points.

Valentine's Day Special: Stamping with a Cork and Broccoli Salad Recipe

Let's face it, crafts rock. They can cheer up the gloomiest day. Even the smallest accomplishment can give you a boost when you're feeling low. Or in my case, when you're living through a historic snowfall!

Today I dipped into my basket of recycling supplies and pulled out a champagne cork. I'd wanted to carve them into my own stamps for a while and today was the day!

Here's how:

1. Create a simple template. I used a heart punch. You don't want to get complex!

2. Glue that to the flat edge of your stamp.

3. Use a craft knife and carefully peel away the excess cork. I found it worked best to slice into the outline of the image and then sort of flick away at the cork, pushing the excess AWAY from the design.

4. Sand the flat surface with an emery board or piece of sandpaper.

5. Test your image. You'll see if you need to remove more cork or clean up an edge.

6. Enjoy! I made the hearts that the pandas are holding, and the hearts on the index cards.

Now for the Broccoli Salad:

1 bag of broccoli salad pre-chopped mix from grocery store

1 C. carrots, chopped

1/2 C. shredded cheese (cheddar or Mexican will work)

8 slices of bacon, fried to crispy and cut with kitchen scissors into tiny bits

3 small packages of raisins

Dressing:

1 C. light mayo

1/2 C. sugar

2 T. cider vinegar

Mix all the broccoli, cheese, bacon, raisins and carrots together. Pour 1/2 of the dressing over your mix. Reserve the rest of the dressing for another salad. Enjoy!

Smitty the Walmart Doorman

Here's a great little story that's bound to bring a smile to your face. Maybe the next time you walk into a Walmart, stop a minute and actually interact with the greeter. It might be the highpoint of your day.

Smitty the Walmart Greeter. (You might have copy and paste this. For some reason Blogger isn't co-operating today!)

SnowFall of 2010

Make a Smilebox slideshow

The Proof is in the Book

The galleys for Photo, Snap, Shot arrived on my doorstep last week. I'm knee-deep in proofing, an activity I simultaneously love and hate.

I love proofing because it gives me one more chance to polish my work. Midnight Ink is very good about allowing me to make changes. (I've worked with publishers before where there was a real fear that any substantive changes would mess up the pagination. But MI is great about this! And Connie, my editor, is a gem.)

At this stage, I come to my book with new eyes. Since each galley sheet shows the page as it will appear in my book, I see my work as a reader will.

What sorts of changes do I make?

1. I double-check for punctuation. Again, MI is very, very thorough, but I challenge myself to find anything missing. So far, I'm on page 134 out of 324 pages and I've found one period and a couple of commas. (All of which could have been my mistakes.) I also found an ending quotation mark missing.

2. I double-check for continuity. I'm trying to be more clear about sequencing and to give my readers more clarity as to the timing.

3. I check for readability. I found a section that my editor and I agree should be changed from expository to a dialogue between Kiki and another character.

4. I check for internal consistency. For example, I am concerned about the style of the words OPEN and CLOSED. Previously we didn't put quotation marks around them, because the all caps did the trick of setting them apart. In part of this book, we used quotation marks, and in another part, we didn't. I'll suggest we not use quotation marks.

5. I fact check. Because this book is complicated, and it involves a real but secret organization, I've spent literally hundreds of hours doing online research and combing through out-of-print books. I've also learned that facts can change, and links can disappear. So from now on, I'm going to print out my research as I go along. For this book, I've worked with librarians in St. Louis and at the American Holocaust Museum to get my facts right. God bless librarians!

6. I check usage. I wrote that a person was a "principle" in an accounting firm. My editor challenged that--and she was right! I still find myself looking up other words and double-checking meanings.

7. I make sure the chapter headings are in order. I even check that the page numbers are sequential.

8. I agonize over the dedication and the acknowledgements.

9. I get legal forms signed for the character naming privileges. This book has a character naming privilege that was auctioned off by a charity, and another privilege that I offered for a contest. I need to have those permission forms in hand before we go to press. Additionally, I used two friends' names in the book, so I emailed them and got their permission.

10. I'm working on getting coupons for the back of the book. I believe we'll have some exciting news in that regard.

Did I say I love proofreading?

I hate proofreading because it demands a total absorption of time, brain-power and effort. I am reading through the pages and typing up the corrections as well as marking them on the galley. (The changes written by hand can be hard to decipher. I want to be as clear as possible.) Meanwhile my husband is reading the book, and certain pages have been marked for sending to experts in medicine and Judaism for fact-checking.

When that's done, I'll do an "all at one time" reading to find tiny gaps in logic and continuity. For example, if a character has seen something on page 42, he can't claim he didn't see it on page 83. I'll also be looking for continuity within the series. For example, the school colors of CALA, the mythical school I created, are gold and royal blue. But in one spot, I had the golfers in my book wearing the wrong colored shirts!

Why do I spend so much time proofing? This takes me at least two solid weeks of work. Maybe three.

I do it because I want to produce the best possible entertainment for my readers. I want to make sure that nothing interferes with your reading pleasure, that nothing jerks you out of the story and back into reality until you reach the words "The End."

Every minute I spend toward that goal is totally worthwhile. Even if sometimes, I'm just positive it's going to drive me nuts.

I Am Not My Hair...Or Am I?

One of the toughest tasks for any newcomer is replacing services. So after our move, I set about systematically replacing my beloved vet, cleaning person, and hairdresser.

Ow. I'd like to think I'm not my hair. That I am me, and if my hair turns white (which it sort of did) or turd-murkle brown (which it definitely was), that my happy place won't disappear.

But it did. Golly, did it ever. See, my first venture to a hairstylist gained me excellent color, but the stylist/owner fobbed me off on an employee who got angry and burned my scalp repeatedly while drying my hair. Even when I complained, she kept on applying the heat.

Next, I went to a lady who decided my hair should be brown. She did a wizard cut--which can be hard on curly hair--but brown? Ugh. But the cut was really, really good, and she did offer to lighten it up. So I went back to her and said that it was, indeed, too dark. So she put the coloring on my hair, redecorated her salon (no lie, she was futzing around with the Christmas tree and the wreaths and the ornaments on her shelves), and then we had the following exchange:

Me: You've lived here a long time. Do you know the Salahis? The husband and wife who crashed the White House State Dinner?

Hairdresser/Salon Owner: Yes, I do. I've been on their yacht. You know, he was a perfectly nice young man. Very sweet. Good to his parents. And then he met that...that...that BLONDIE!

Need I tell you that my hair color was pretty darn weird? Like a bleached out lemon rind.

So I went to another hairdresser. (Are you counting? If I haven't left anyone out, we're up to four in four months now.) This salon kept sending me invitations as a "newcomer" to try them out. The place proved almost impossible to find. The stylist was nice...but she added so many low lights, my hair was back to...ugh...some disgusting shade of mud.

I went around all week avoiding mirrors. My husband said, "It's not too bad." Which is code for, "I won't divorce you."

Finally, in desperation, I went to a salon in the mall and threw myself on their mercy. "Can anyone here help me?"

And a nice man did. Then, because we were BOTH worried about the color, he dried my hair. The stylist made my hair straight, as you can see from the photo of me and Debbi Mack at a signing at The Little Professor Book Center in Eldersburg, MD.

It's still not me.

I'm a curly girl.

But it's close.

Bits and Pieces for Friday

Here's a round-up of information, ideas, quotes and trends you'll want to explore:

1. Trade Paperbacks Surge in Popularity http://tinyurl.com/dmr83k

A mass market paperback is one of those smaller paperbacks like you buy in a drugstore. A trade paperback is larger, maybe 5 x 7 inches or 6 x 8, inches and it's almost a cross between a paperback book and a hardcover. Hardcovers are very pricey, except that many discount big box stores like Kmart and Target discount them heavily. Booksellers like Amazon and Barnes & Noble and Borders and Books-a-Million also discount them. To me, the biggest problem is weight. Yeah, with the cost of additional luggage constantly rising, a hardback book--although that's my preference for the joy of the experience and for the longevity of the product itself--is too darn heavy to cart around.

2. E. Desmond Lee, St. Louis Philanthropist, Dies

I can't begin to list all the ways that Des Lee influenced St. Louis with his generosity. His name appears all over town on buildings and in hallways. I remember when my husband David first met him. Des Lee wanted to know all about my husband, which I think was probably a clue as to why Des was such a treasure: Despite his own illustrious career and his business success, he genuinely cared about others.

http://tinyurl.com/yewkpce


3. This from a New York Times article, a quotation about whether there's any merit to being private (as opposited to using to Twitter to record one's every waking moment) attributed to the poet C.K. Williams--

More and more lately, as, not even minding the slippages yet, the aches and sad softenings, I settle into my other years, I notice how many of what I once thought were evidences of repression, sexual or otherwise, now seem, in other people anyway, to be varieties of dignity, withholding, tact.


In other words...maybe conducting your person business over a cell phone in a crowded public place is NOT the height of cool, folks.

Where Do You Get Your Ideas?

That's a question people often ask.

Honestly, my ideas come from all over the place. Although I have to admit, my best resource is print media, particularly the newspapers that show up in my driveway every morning.

Here's a sampling:

1. Obits--I love reading them. I'm always sad that I've missed the pleasure of meeting so many fascinating people. That said, their obits both inspire and tickle me. Today, the Washington Post ran an obit for Jean Carroll, a comedian who could "see the humor in the human predicament." (Yeah, it is a bit of a predicament, isn't it?)

Jean said, "People are never satisfied. Lawyers want to be doctors. Single men wish they were married. Married men wish they were dead."

And this...Jean discussed her married life, explaining that she told her husband, "Tonight you are really going to enjoy yourself." His response? "Why? You leaving me?"

2. News articles--In either the Post or the NYT appeared an article by Marc Lacey with this stunning opener: "When it comes to gore, Mexico's drug traffickers seem to compete among themselves for the title of most depraved." Among their ucky activities were these: chopping off the heads of rivals, stringing dead rivals from bridges, burning their genitals, and the clincher...removing the face from a dead man and sewing it onto a soccer ball. ("Honey? Have you seen my sewing kit?")

In a game of one-upsmanship, now a drug lord is boiling the remains of his rivals in lye, in "what has become known as pozole, for Mexican stew." ("Cancel that reservation to eat Mexican tonight, sweetheart.")


And then there are other ways I collect ideas--

1. Phone calls--A business associate of my husband used to work as a boat captain. T.S. told David that he will never, ever eat crabs because he saw too many of them munching on the leftovers of dead people. (Call Weight Watchers! I have a new and improved dieting trick.)

2. Guest speakers--Last night Peter Earnest from the International Spy Museum spoke to our local Mystery Writers of America group. According to Peter, our national defenses get one MILLION attacks a day from hackers looking at our intelligence defenses or trying to deposit Trojans into our national computer systems. President Obama has recently named someone to look into this...but our own FBI has not been able to complete the installation of a computer system, a system that we recognized the need for after 9/11.

Peter characterized this as "a huge threat. Who's to say there are ways we are being had we don't even know about."

I mentioned to Peter that most of the books we read portray spies as dashing men. "Do you ever use middle-aged women?" He told me they use all sorts of people in all walks of life. He also told our group that during his years as a covert agent, "our wives were drawn increasingly into operations. They were very good, often better (than the men were) at assessing people."

Best of all, I love it when there's an intersection of what I see/hear/read in the media with my own life. Here are two examples.

1. Heighted Security at Airports? (I don't think so!) Our family was flying back from Orlando on December 28, after the incident in Detroit. We expected heightened security, although the level has been ORANGE for as long as I can recall. We had a question about our seating, which we asked as we checked in our luggage. Guess what? The agents never asked to see our IDs. They got all caught up looking at their screens and seating charts, that they lost track of what they were doing and simply put our luggage on the conveyor belt. Obviously, there's no heuristic device that agents must manually check to affirm they've performed this simple security check.

2. But She's Getting All That Money! I'm a big fan of getting my shoes polished by the shoe shine guys at Nordstroms. Recently I was waiting in line with a bunch of businessmen when they started chatting about Tiger Woods and his wife Elin. "He's cheated on her, but she's going to get a lot of money," several of them said. Oh, really? I contended that Tiger Woods wouldn't be worth what he is today had he not been a married man. After all, the bulk of his wealth comes from endorsements, not tournament winnings. This month's Vanity Fair Magazine supports my contention that he only got married for his image. Sorry...Elin can't possibly be paid enough--and probably won't be--to compensate for that sort of disrespect.

And strange little aside.

As some of you know, I've been posting a lot on Facebook about the fox in our backyard. My vet explained two reasons NOT to feed foxes and to steer clear of them: Scabies and rabies. Turns out the local foxes are magnets for a parasitic mange (scabies) and often are carriers of rabies. So, cute as Mr. Fox is...I'm keeping my distance and I'm only letting my dogs outside on a leash!

My Mother's Last Gift

Tonight or tomorrow the ornaments will come down. The tree will go out in the trash or in the back of our lot where the fox might use it for shelter. All the holiday trinkets will be wrapped in tissue paper. They'll go back into plastic boxes, to be carried down to the basement and stored for another year.

I will linger over each ornament, but one in particular will be hard to put away. This small Bichon in a stocking (above) is a very, very special ornament. Not just because it's cute, or because it's different, but because it marks the end of an era.

We have a tradition. On Christmas Day, one member of our family (my mother) would direct the opening of the gifts. She'd pass them out and make sure every person had something in hand. Then she'd allow us to open up, and oooohs and aaaaahs would ensue. We'd all examine our gifts--examine everyone else's gifts--and wait for Mom to pass out more presents. There was a strict sense of ritual to all this. But as constrictive as it sometimes felt, we all loved it. Mom's method assured us that each and every person had something to open. Each and every gift was given its due amount of appreciation.

This year, we celebrated Christmas in a hotel room outside of Disney World. At a Walgreens, I found a darling little Christmas tree made of curls of gold wire and hung with beads. This I put on a table in the middle of our hotel room in the Omni at Champion's Gate. Then my family gathered around.

The passing around of the presents was a bit more sedate. We felt Mom's absence keenly. My sister Margaret orchestrated some of the distribution and opening of gifts. But it was a bit more, um, haphazard without Mom doing her combination marinet and benevolent Santa routine. We were all opening gifts while fighting painful lumps in our throats.

My gifts for my sisters caused teary eyes. Years ago, I'd taken Mom to an art fair where a silhouette artist had cut her profile freehand using sharp scissors. During our move to the metro DC area, I'd uncovered these. So I framed them for Jane and Margaret. (I scanned one for myself, and it's on my computer, but I gave them the originals.)

After all the packages were unwrapped, Meg said, "There's one gift left. It's for Jonie." (That's my nickname.)

Meg handed it over. "This was the only Christmas gift Mom bought before she died."

Inside was the Bichon ornament.

That Compulsion Known as Writing

I spent the holiday with my family in Disney World. I can't tell you if it's the happiest place on earth, but on December 26, it might have been one of the coldest. I did get to go through the Haunted House twice, so that made ME a happy camper.

I wandered out of the spooky mansion, noticed this gypsy caravan, and took it for an omen. I choose to believe with all my heart that good times are ahead for me in my chosen profession.

See, I've always wanted to be an author--and I've always moved toward that goal.

I started writing "books" when I was seven. Back then I stapled together sheets of paper and decorated the covers. I wrote poetry inside.

I started winning awards for my work when I was in middle school. I started an authorized newspaper back in Griffith (IN) High School and nearly got kicked out of school for it. (The stupid journalism teacher was angry that my readership was higher than hers. Wonder where she is now. Who cares, right?) The next year I wrote a musical. Yes, you read that right. As a high school senior, I wrote a musical complete with songs, music and full three act script.

My friend Doug Brendel even helped with some of the lyrics. He survived, apparently unblemished. Doug is now a missionary who makes regular trips to Bellarus. Check him out: http://www.dougbrendel.com/

Doug and I and our third amigo, Bill LaDow, all became authors. Bill wrote a biography of racing giant Ray Nichels. Check it out: http://www.legendsofnascar.com/Ray_Nichels.htm

My point? Early on, I recognized in others that spark, that drive toward creativity. And when you hang with other authors, it rubs off. Oh, I don't think we ever sat around and said, "Gee, I'd like to write a book when I grow up." In fact, I know we didn't. But we saw in each other a different type of thinking, a way of processing the world that demanded we express ourselves.

When people find out that I'm an author, they often confide, "I'd like to write a book." Some even say, "I should write a book." Or even, "I could write a book."

I always try to answer their questions honestly. Or to encourage them. Most of them walk away unhappy. They want me to do more. One woman wrote last week and asked me to help her "make the connections I need to get published." A younger woman slipped me a note with her email address. "I need you to help me write my book," she said. "I've gotten it started, but I need help."

Sorry. It doesn't work like that. I sure wish it did, but it doesn't.

What I really should tell them is: Go lie down and hope the urge will pass.

It's a hard road, and there's no clear path. I don't think any two of my author friends has the same publication story. I think the road ahead will get murkier for the publishing industry. Almost all the names on the bestseller lists these days are authors who've been publishing for a while. "Guaranteed" bestsellers, if you will.

But as Nancy Pickard said at Bouchercon, the only part of this that we can control is our willingness to sit down and write. And when we write, we can only work as hard as possible to deliver the best possible story.

Clearly for me, this writing "thang" is a compulsion. It's how I survive. How I make sense (when I do make sense) of the world. It's something I can't live without.